diff --git a/src/applications/people/editor/__tests__/PhabricatorUserEditorTestCase.php b/src/applications/people/editor/__tests__/PhabricatorUserEditorTestCase.php
index ca4b5169f2..ec5e699aa0 100644
--- a/src/applications/people/editor/__tests__/PhabricatorUserEditorTestCase.php
+++ b/src/applications/people/editor/__tests__/PhabricatorUserEditorTestCase.php
@@ -15,6 +15,8 @@ final class PhabricatorUserEditorTestCase extends PhabricatorTestCase {
     $this->registerUser(
       'PhabricatorUserEditorTestCaseOK',
       'PhabricatorUserEditorTestCase@example.com');
+
+    $this->assertEqual(true, true);
   }
 
   public function testRegistrationEmailInvalid() {
diff --git a/src/infrastructure/__tests__/PhabricatorInfrastructureTestCase.php b/src/infrastructure/__tests__/PhabricatorInfrastructureTestCase.php
index 68822568ae..d397788f20 100644
--- a/src/infrastructure/__tests__/PhabricatorInfrastructureTestCase.php
+++ b/src/infrastructure/__tests__/PhabricatorInfrastructureTestCase.php
@@ -16,6 +16,7 @@ final class PhabricatorInfrastructureTestCase
    */
   public function testEverythingImplemented() {
     id(new PhutilSymbolLoader())->selectAndLoadSymbols();
+    $this->assertEqual(true, true);
   }
 
   public function testApplicationsInstalled() {
diff --git a/src/infrastructure/storage/__tests__/AphrontIsolatedDatabaseConnectionTestCase.php b/src/infrastructure/storage/__tests__/AphrontIsolatedDatabaseConnectionTestCase.php
index ab1ce2f7b1..29f230b563 100644
--- a/src/infrastructure/storage/__tests__/AphrontIsolatedDatabaseConnectionTestCase.php
+++ b/src/infrastructure/storage/__tests__/AphrontIsolatedDatabaseConnectionTestCase.php
@@ -17,6 +17,8 @@ final class AphrontIsolatedDatabaseConnectionTestCase
     queryfx(
       $this->newIsolatedConnection(),
       'INSERT INVALID SYNTAX');
+
+    $this->assertEqual(true, true);
   }
 
   public function testInsertGeneratesID() {
@@ -39,6 +41,8 @@ final class AphrontIsolatedDatabaseConnectionTestCase
   public function testDeletePermitted() {
     $conn = $this->newIsolatedConnection();
     queryfx($conn, 'DELETE');
+
+    $this->assertEqual(true, true);
   }
 
   public function testTransactionStack() {
diff --git a/src/infrastructure/storage/lisk/__tests__/LiskIsolationTestCase.php b/src/infrastructure/storage/lisk/__tests__/LiskIsolationTestCase.php
index aba1873751..67128e82da 100644
--- a/src/infrastructure/storage/lisk/__tests__/LiskIsolationTestCase.php
+++ b/src/infrastructure/storage/lisk/__tests__/LiskIsolationTestCase.php
@@ -54,6 +54,7 @@ final class LiskIsolationTestCase extends PhabricatorTestCase {
       // Expected, pass.
     }
 
+    $this->assertEqual(true, true);
   }
 
   public function testMagicMethods() {